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Gregory Tenenbaum
June 17th, 2006, 05:29 AM
I prefer Kim Cattral in "Mannequin" myself.



But here's an interesting story:


London, England—Sources close to rock legend Paul McCartney claim the former Beatle has agreed to pay his estranged wife, Heather Mills, nearly 380 million dollars to terminate their nearly 4 year marriage. A spokesman for McCartney says the deal was reached when McCarney suggested that instead of the usual divorce proceedings the couple amicably settle the split by placing a monetary value to each of the times that the couple had sexual intercourse.

"Paul brought up the idea of just paying her for sex," claims McCartney's lawyer Mitch Tolston. "He is worth almost 1.5 billion dollars and after careful consideration he feels that to avoid getting taken to the cleaners he would prefer to just pay for the sex outright and leave well enough alone,"

McCartney intimated to friends that he felt this was the only fair way to end the marriage financially and he went on to claim that he's happy that the sex "severely tapered off" after the couple married.

"We were really going at it at the beginning when we first met," claims McCartney. "It was as much as one time a day when we first started dating. That one leg action was really hot to me. I would always tell her to wrap her leg around me and that really got me going. But after awhile it got kinda old and we were down to once a year near the end."

The couple copulated 65 times in their nearly 4 years of marriage together bringing his per sexual conquest total to 4 million dollars per episode. The couple bested the national average of marital sex per year by fornicating 16 times per year wherein the average couple will have 11 encounters a year. This surplus of booty will net Mills an additional 80 million dollars.

"Having sex with that old man was really disgusting," confessed a tired Mills. "I'm glad I could stomach as much as I did because I'm coming out a little richer for it and that was the purpose of this. I just wish I could've gotten credit for the times we did it when we were dating, then I could buy London."

McCartney's attorneys reached a deal wherein the singer would only pay for the times he had sex with Mills after they were married. McCartney's representation expunged the "try-out period" from the agreement.

"That was a real coup," confesses attorney Tolston. "Everyone knows the real booty action comes at the beginning and we saved Paul a lot of money by slipping the 'married sex' into the agreement."

McCartney is reportedly pleased with the agreement and he privately claims "it could have been worse." He also went on to say that he has no further plans to ever marry again but will consider taking up residence in Amsterdam's Red Light District.

"I've learned my lesson now," admits McCartney. "I'm just going to pay for it up front and outright so that I can hang on to the rest of my money."


http://www.fourdayweekend.com/Weekend%20Report/may_18_2006.htm

ablarc
June 17th, 2006, 08:04 AM
Interesting story.

Fabrizio
June 17th, 2006, 11:31 AM
I know Heather and was in on this story from the beginning. The above is a fabrication. For one thing where did they get those detailed quotes? McCartney is as reserved and press shy as it gets and Mills is a great lady and a lot smarter than to be so open. There are lots of people right now who hate the woman.....I could tell you stories...

Merry
June 18th, 2006, 06:19 AM
The couple bested the national average of marital sex per year by fornicating 16 times per year wherein the average couple will have 11 encounters a year.

OMG, am I sooooooo glad I'm not married.....this can't be right.....11 encounters a YEAR!!

ablarc
June 18th, 2006, 07:10 AM
Whole thing's made up. Follow the link.

Merry
June 18th, 2006, 08:54 AM
Whole thing's made up. Follow the link.
Yes, but no reason why we can't have a bit of fun with it.

Gregory Tenenbaum
June 19th, 2006, 02:34 AM
The site didnt exactly look like a CNN news type site.

But I would still prefer to go out with a real Mannequin, a la Kim Cattrall in Mannequin (1987).

http://www.andylandusa.com/cinema-mann.htm

Ah the memories

MrSpice
June 19th, 2006, 10:12 AM
I know Heather and was in on this story from the beginning. The above is a fabrication. For one thing where did they get those detailed quotes? McCartney is as reserved and press shy as it gets and Mills is a great lady and a lot smarter than to be so open. There are lots of people right now who hate the woman.....I could tell you stories...

If she wants to be liked, she should announce a press conference and say that that she won't take any money from Paul except for her house. The only reason she is hated is because people think that she took advantage of Paul and wants to make some good living of him. Very easy for her to change this perception, but I guess she does not want to.

I wonder why he did not ask her to sign a pre-nup.

Fabrizio
June 19th, 2006, 10:24 AM
They´re working things out in private. Rather than a press conference, she will be on Larry King shortly explaining a lot of things.